You’ve heard the phrase “ It’s not the destination, it’s about the Journey”. I’ve heard it, you’ve heard it but what does it really mean?
I recently heard a podcast from one of my mentors, Melissa Ambrosini, where she interviewed Jack Canfield-an influencer for me for sure (most famously known for the Chicken Soup for the Soul series). You can hear the full Podcast here. It was like a lightening bolt hit me and for the first time, I got that message in a whole new way.
We can set goals for ourselves and make a plan. Which is great because it sets in motion a plan of action. A way to direct your focus and point you on some sort of path. However, there is a high probability that you will have some roadblocks. You will inevitably go up and down~that’s life, as they say. But that is where, if you really stop and savor it, you get the gifts. And I think I understood that completely for the first time, in a whole new way. It’s difficult when your in the down part, when your in the valley to think that in anyway this could be good thing. But that’s how we, as a society, have been condition to think! It’s those valleys that force us out of our comfort zone to rethink, reimagine, and redesign our life to create a new way of looking at it. It forces our hand. It makes you turn your head and look in a new direction. And you may be pleasantly surprised!
If you really start to reframe how you see these down cycles, you can begin to see the gifts it brings. Ask the questions: What can I learn from this? What is there that I can start to see life differently, What message am I getting from this? All of a sudden it’s not life happening to you (victim mentality) it’s more about life happening for you. (victor mentality). It’s a redesign of your life as you currently know it and something amazing could come out of this low point.
As an example, for me, when I was struggling to redesign my life as my 3 kids were growing older. They weren’t so reliant on me to feed them, bathe them, etc. and all of a sudden the identity of “caretaker” was slowly diminishing. I felt empty. Like I was losing something. I was in the low part of the flow. But it forced my hand. It was a gift, the Universe, God, (whatever word resonates for you) was bringing me, but at the time it felt awful! I’m not gonna BS you! It sucked. When you’re stagnant and just pressing repeat on your life’s player that’s when you’re complaining, depressed, feeling empty, and unfulfilled. You keep wondering why nothing is changing. Because you’re just pressing REPEAT.
When I sat down with myself and asked the questions, I started to create a life I truly wanted. The journey of it, the thick of it, was asking me to turn my head and look in another direction. A life where I now had the tools to create, as opposed to just do. I actually started to enjoy the journey of all the ups and downs! It creates an excitement for life! You start to feel alive. You start to live in your Bliss. Looking back, I now see that it was all put in place for a reason. That my destiny had come around to make me see what life had to really offer me. Enjoying the journey with the lows and seeing what the gifts were, enriched my life in a whole new way.
So make your goals and your plans. You need that as beacon of light when you’re in the dark. You need to focus your attention in a direction, in order to create movement. But don’t be so attached to the outcome. Don’t be so adverse to the bumps in the road. They jiggle you around and shake you up to get you to think more. To think differently than you ever have. Because it’s the gift of life, it’s the journey as you create and build a life you actually love. Because you made it so!
Yours along the journey,